2010:2

Star Trek: First Contact DVD.

Graveyard Candle

1 box of Maltesers.

2 jars of Cadbury’s Highlights.

Supplies:

2 packs of 8 disposable lighters.

Rejected Item:

There was a DVD of a Russian film about the Nuremberg Trials which looked interesting, but I couldn’t find any indication of a running time, so I thought it best to let it go, in case it was just a bit of newsreel from the Soviet equivalent of Pathé News. However, I’ve just looked it up on tinternet and I think it’s this proper hour long documentary, so, if the Second Rule doesn’t kick in, I may purchase it on my next visit.

Notes:

1. It’s been so long since I’d been to the Newcastle Poundland that they’d changed things around and I had to walk round twice to find the books - which were actually right next to the DVDs at the top of the shop so I don’t know why I didn’t spot them the first time. Not that there was much there - apart from a rather nice copy of Anthony Hope’s The Prisoner of Zenda and its sequel, Rupert of Hentzau, in a faux leather
binding. Highly recommended if you haven’t already got them, which, of course, I have.

2. It’s Halloween in Poundland, a bit early, but I thought I’d get a candle to “create an eerie atmosphere” in case they run out.

3. I had to dig deep for the Star Trek DVD, hidden under piles of Coldplay DVDs and the like. It’s one of those previously stuck on a comic, so no special features, but as I’m not a great fan of The Next Generation, I thought I might as well get it. Being the eighth film in the series it conforms to the ‘even numbers good’ rule and is perhaps the best of the baldy-yedded feller’s forays on the big screen. I always found The Next Generation a bit full of itself and a tad priggish. It also had a kid in it, which is never a good idea. And I never understood what the telepathic woman was there for and why she got to sit on the front seat of the bus. And that Data could be an annoying little git at times too. Telepathic Woman should have had a quiet word with him when he was going on about wanting be human (which is what all these bloody robots go on about), tell him dunner be daft, you spend half your time working out what you want for tea. Data: (in annoying whiny voice) But I want to experience real emotions. Telepathic Woman: Shut up yer moaning. At least you’re walking about, not like Bing Crosby’s granddaughter - think on that. Or summat along those lines so those people walking about at the back of the bus (I presume they’re the cleaners) might see that she had a purpose and would stop chuntering about her perks. Anyway, First Contact is good. Mainly because it’s got Alfre Woodard in it, and the Borg. I like the Borg. It’s obvious some thought went into their creation, it wasn’t just a case of sticking some plasticine on their heads. And they also had original design concepts when it came to their spaceships. The Borg are the future. That’s why after The Next Generation they couldn’t continue boldly going but had to sit on a space station or get transported to another galaxy with Maggie Thatcher in charge, and after that they just started again. We’ve come a long way since the Sixties when the mission was to wander round finding alien dolly birds for Captain Kirk. Now we are in the time of the Borg. I was listening to George Osborne (Chancellor of the Exchequer and a man who has never set foot in Poundland) the other day, talking about those scrounging bastards who choose a life on benefits as a lifestyle and refuse to be assimilated into the collective. More power to his Borgian elbow say I.

September 2010

Thursday, 9th September - Newcastle-under-Lyme

October 2010

Monday, 11th October - Worthing





		Indestructible Man DVD. Attack Of The Crab Monsters DVD. King Of The Zombies DVD. The Brain That Wouldn’t Die DVD. Plan 9 From Outer Space DVD. Supplies: 2 packs of 8 disposable lighters.

			Notes: My first visit to Worthing Poundland and a happy encounter with a well-stocked Halloween DVD display stand. The obvious downside to this purchase of classic horror and sci-fi films from the 40s and 50s is that next year they will be bundled together in three-on-one-disc compilations, which many of them were a few years ago, but one never knows for sure, so one takes the plunge. Indestructible Man: Starring Lon Chaney as Butcher Benson (that’s a Christian name that seems to have dropped out of favour lately - I used to go to a dentist called Butcher Bunch) whose body is revived by a ‘lone wolf cancer researcher’ (according to the blurb on the back of the box). Whether there is any lupine action in the film or whether they’re too poorly to attack Lon, I don’t know. I’m also not sure what ‘The scream that shocks the screen with 300,000 volts of Horror!’ refers to on the cover. There seems to be a lady doing the screaming but she is not mentioned in the blurb so I don’t know what part her scream plays in the creation of Indestructible Man. It was directed by Jack Pollexfen. Nuff said. The Brain That Wouldn’t Die: There’s a lot of brain that wouldn’t die films out there. They can be split into two categories: brains that won’t die and are kept in glass jars where they pulsate menacingly, and brains that won’t die but are kept in the original head so that the actor can sit in a cupboard and stick his head through a hole in the top - presumably a cheaper ‘special’ effect than a pulsating brain. In this case, judging by the picture on the cover, there’s a woman sat in the cupboard. However, I should point out that there’s a very scary thing at the very beginning of the film, at least it made me jump and fully justified the film’s 12 certificate. Attack of the Crab Monsters: An early effort from Roger Corman which I’ve never seen, so I’m looking forward to this. I had a quick look to check the quality of the print, which is o.k., and there was a decapitation in the first five minutes, so this should be good. King of the Zombies: Now this is a tricky one. It’s a horror comedy in the style of the Bob Hope classic The Ghost Breakers and like that it features a black actor in a supporting role. In The Ghost Breakers it’s Willie Best, doing his schtick and in this it’s Mantan Moreland doing his. And there is a difference. Times have changed and now we know that medieval England was simply awash with Africans, but in the bad old days of racial stereotyping in Hollywood, black actors only got to play servants and porters and maids, and were usually there to supply comic relief or tap-dance. What bothers me is that some films, like The Ghost Breakers are now consigned to un-PC oblivion - true, Willie Best can make you cringe at times - but it’s a good film nonetheless. And in the case of King of the Zombies, which was the product of a small studio and was aimed as much at black audiences as at white, there’s less to cringe at and a lot more to admire in the comic business of Mantan Moreland. I don’t want to sound like those people who reckon ‘The Black and White Minstrel Show’ was good family entertainment, I just want to mention babies and bathwater. Plan 9 From Outer Space: It was in 1980 that Michael Medved dubbed this ‘the worst movie ever made’ and sparked off a number of books and TV programmes (and a film, It Came from Hollywood) making fun of low-budget sci-fi and horror movies. Of course it isn’t. Bad films are either boring or annoying, or star Casey Affleck. Plan 9 From Outer Space fits none of these criteria. And remember my friends, future events such as these will affect you in the future.

November 2010

Thursday, 18th November - Hanley

Icons in the Fire by Alexander Walker.

Steamboat Bill Jr. DVD.

Classical Christmas CD.

4 Novelty Tealights (snowmen).

1 jar of Cadbury’s Highlights.

Rust Remover.

Supplies:

2 packs of 6 disposable lighters.

Rejected Item:

Diaries 1980-2001: From Political Disaster to Election Triumph: The Political Diaries of Giles Radice
I picked this up since the name rang a bell but then I put it back down because I don’t read political memoirs since they just go on about then we passed this bill then we passed that bill then we promised everybody would get jetpacks then we forgot about that. It wasn’t until I was making the lobby for tea that I realised who Giles Radice was. He was the bloke in the Labour Party who had an interociter. If you’ve seen This Island Earth then you’ll know what I mean. If you haven’t then this font is too big to explain. Anyway, Giles Radice was the spitting image of the men from Metaluna who came down to earth for some reason which I cannot now remember but who all had interociters. Giles Radice was a very comforting presence when he popped up on Question Time or Newsnight because you got the feeling that everything would be all right because at least one member of the government had an interociter and knew what was going on. Once he went back to Metaluna then everything went to pot and we were fighting silly wars and stopping people smoking and finally letting the Eloi back in to blame all our ills on we Morlocks. So, I should’ve bought his book in case it contained instructions about how to build an interociter.




	Giles Radice.




	Exeter from This Island Earth.

		Notes: 1. Alexander Walker was another man with an impressive haircut. He was a film critic and although I don’t think his tastes coincided with mine I was taken by the subtitle of his book, “The Decline and Fall of Almost Everybody in the British Film Industry 1984-2000” since I like to read about how rubbish the British film industry is. 2. Since the festive season has rolled round again I bought some festive tealights (snowmen this time) and the regular CD of Christmas music. I was going to let that go this year since they usually just recycle the same out-of-copyright tracks in a different order and I didn’t hold out much hope when I picked up the Classical Christmas CD since I thought it would just be a load of carols sung by squeaky-voiced people. However, it is proper classical music with some tracks you’d expect, the Troika from Prokofiev’s Lieutenant Kije, Unto Us A Child is Born, from Handel’s Messiah, Corelli’s Christmas Concerto, etc., and quite a few that I don’t know at all. So, it should be good and will make a nice change from Bing. 3. If somebody came up to me in the street and asked me who was my favourite comedian of the silent film era I’d say why do you want to know. But the answer is Buster Keaton. However, aside from a few shorts and the famous bits like the house falling on him, I haven’t seen any full-length Buster Keaton films apart from The General. So I thought I should buy Steamboat Bill Jr. Especially since it says on the cover “The Original Hilarious Version!”, so I’m not being fobbed off with one of the many other copies which were below par in the laughter stakes. 4. The rust remover I came across by happy accident when I was perusing the tools. I need some rust remover to clean my machete. Why do you have a machete, you may ask, and I could give you the same answer I gave to that man in the street, but I won’t. I inherited a machete from my late father; where he got it from I don’t know. He had not spent his youth in the Amazonian jungle searching for El Dorado, he just happened to have a machete. And an axe and a saw. I put my father’s tools in the shed and forgot about them. Last month I demolished the shed. This was a major project that I’d managed to put off for years. The shed was mainly full of old furniture that we thought we shouldn’t chuck in case it might be needed by the sons when they had all moved away and had their own sheds to put furniture in. However, the shed was at the top of the garden and those crazy kids who lived on the other side of the hedge would sneak through occasionally and kick a few holes in it, so over the years the rain got in and the shed and everything in it went rotten. So I was told to demolish the shed and get rid of everything, all the furniture, a bike, a massive old typewriter and a Mr. Frosty. I was a bit apprehensive since everything in the shed was covered in droppings of an animal nature. I originally thought these belonged to the giant hedgehog who lived in the shed, but just lately William the Cat had been catching rats on a regular basis and depositing them by the back door. Not little rats either (they’re called mice) but big buggers, so I wondered whether they might all be congregating in the shed and having parties, riding the bike around and making themselves Mr. Frosties. I remember when I was little I was very interested in animals and such like and wanted to be David Attenborough when I grew up. On reflection it was a good thing I gave up that ambition since he’s still got the job. One reason I would never have made a good David Attenborough is that I have a fear of insects and I also don’t like the seamier side of animal life, like droppings. I’m o.k. looking at a bird in flight and saying that’s a heron, but when it comes to lifting up a sofa to see what’s been living there for twenty years I’m a bit, well, scared, really. So I decided to take my time with demolishing the shed and knocked down a wall, then left it a couple of days, moved a chair, then left it a couple of days, so that whatever was living there would get the idea and move on. I could have written them a notice of eviction and shoved it under the door but I know enough about animals to know they can’t read. Although if it was the rats and they can make themselves Mr. Frosties then who’s to say they couldn’t have used the massive typewriter to send me a note claiming squatters’ rights or some such. Plus they know I’m William the Cat’s butler, so things could get nasty and before you know it lawyers would be involved. So, I proceeded with the other stratagem of slow-motion demolition. And it worked very well, apart from the woodlice who obviously hadn’t got the message at all and were still waiting for the letter. I found the giant hedgehog’s nest, which was underneath the shed, and I gave it a few pokes with my rake in case he was hibernating but he wasn’t so that was o.k., and in a plastic bucket full of water I found my father’s tools and the machete. They were rusty. So I bought the rust remover. Why, you may ask, if I threw away the furniture, the typewriter, a bike and a Mr. Frosty, would I want to keep a machete, and not only that, why am I going to the trouble of cleaning it? It is not as though I am not going to follow in my father’s footsteps and sail to South America in search of El Dorado. I have no little jobs around the house which require the use of a machete. And yet, it does seem like something one should hold onto. Not least because I don’t know whether you can still buy them in a shop like nunchucks. If you came across a pair of nunchucks in your shed you’d hold onto them even though you might have no intention of sailing to Hong Kong to take on the Triad gang which had killed your brother. Not that I have a brother. By which I don’t mean that he was killed by a Triad gang. I just don’t have a brother. That’s it. I have a sister, but she lives in Cornwall which is not noted for Triad activity so she should be safe and luckily I won’t need my nunchucks since they don’t exist. Like my brother. So I’m holding onto my machete just in case I ever need it. A machete is, after a gun, the weapon of choice for loony people on a rampage and the way things are going it might just come in handy.


	Monday, 29th November - Chichester

The Killer Shrews DVD.

Funkeys Starter Kit.

1 box of Maltesers.

1 Toblerone.

1 packet of Werther’s Originals Chocolate.

1 box of After Eight mint chocolate thins.

2 E-180 VHS videotapes.

2 birthday cards.

1 pack of 20 festive napkins.

Supplies:

1 pack of 6 disposable lighters.




		St. Nosferatu

Notes:

1. To Chichester on a bitterly cold November day, with the good lady wife and two sons in tow. We arrived at lunchtime and popped into Crispin Glover’s Teashoppe for summat eat. Despite the hour, I chose the Full English Breakfast (but my adventurous nature when it comes to haute cuisine is well known). Then on to the Cathedral which was very nice, although not as big as the one in The Pillars of the Earth. I used to enjoy visiting cathedrals but then they started asking for money at the door and that annoyed me. Best bit in the bible is Jesus chucking the money changers out of the Temple so I don’t think he’d approve. However, Chichester Cathedral is not too bad. There are boxes for donations scattered round the place, but the two ladies dressed in monk suits (proper, not those currently being advertised on the telly by Mr. JML) who greeted us at the entrance did not hold out the hand. So we wandered round a bit and noted the treasures on display, a rather nice Marc Chagall window, a rather ugly John Piper altar screen, the Arundel tomb of Larkin’s poem, a portion of the Roman mosaic floor of the building which lay under the Cathedral (we put 20p in a slot to light it up) and a relic of St. Richard (I paid another 20p and lit a candle - well you don’t see medieval saint’s relics every day and it’s hard to shake the old superstitions). Outside the Cathedral we came upon a statue of St. Richard which the good lady wife erroneously identified as Nosferatu. However, allowances were made due to her being brought up a Methodist, and the fact that there was a strong resemblance. We ended our visit to Chichester with a visit to Poundland.

2. Since we visited the shop en masse a lot of miscellaneous rubbish went in the basket which I feel no need to comment upon, but I must say a word about The Killer
Shrews. This is a true classic. We watched it on our return home, just after we had seen Splice, Vincenzo Natali’s latest film. Coincidentally they are both concerned with genetic manipulation and it is interesting to compare the films and note the changes which have occurred over the last fifty years. One thing they have in common is that scientists cannot be trusted. They will blithely risk the fate of the world in pursuit of knowledge. One thing that has changed is the ambition of scientists. In Splice the stated aim is to find a cure for cancer. In The Killer Shrews the plan is to tackle the problem of overpopulation by shrinking everybody in order to conserve resources. I would have liked more details about this project. At one point the hero does state that he doesn’t “ask questions because it’s against my principles”, which is a curious choice for the screenwriter, on the one hand dispensing with a lot of boring exposition, but on the other leaving the audience pretty much in the dark as regards why a scheme to reduce the size of people resulted in the creation of giant shrews (luckily for the special effects department they are the size of dogs). The most fascinating character in the film is the producer’s girlfriend (Ingrid Goude, Miss Sweden 1956) who makes some interesting thespian choices and injects a hint of post-modernism into the film when she berates the hero for his lack of curiosity over her accent. The final scene when they weld some barrels together, get inside and walk to the beach, is either full of suspense, or reminiscent of Last of the Summer Wine, depending on your mood.

3. I thought of the Island of Killer Shrews while playing with my Funkey. The shrews are not destroyed but are left to kill each other and thus die of starvation, or so the chief scientist believes, and the producer’s girlfriend, who confesses at one point that she is a biologist, does not contradict him. However I did wonder whether once they were rid of Compo and the gang, the shrews might calm down a bit and create a cosy little world for themselves. I was urged to buy the Funkey Starter Kit by No. 2 son on the time-honoured principle of you get a lot of stuff for your pound. Which you do. You get a big thing that you plug into a USB port on your computer, two little things which fit into the big thing, and a CD. Once it’s all loaded you get messages saying download a later version which takes 3 hours, and then you’re in Funkeyworld and you can wander around at will, playing little games to make money which you can then spend on stuff to decorate your house, which is called a crib, though not in a Baby Jesus sense. Judging by the simplicity of the games I assume funkeys are aimed at children, although the emphasis on doing up your house might suggest an alternative audience of interior designers. There is a dark side to Funkeyworld, however, and I am not just referring to the things that run up and steal your money. It is slowly dying. It exists in the ether of the internet but it is obviously a failed experiment and is no longer fully supported by its creator. Which is why, of course, you can now buy funkeys in Poundland. I did wonder how many such worlds are out there, the brainchildren of clever clogs, the latest gimmick to lure the kiddies, the many variants on dungeons and dragons, the imaginary places where like minds can congregate, now discarded in favour of something new, but still existing in a kind of nuclear half-life, gradually running down, abandoned by their gods.

December 2010

Friday, 10th December - Hanley




	Starship Troopers 3: Marauder DVD. Picking Up The Pieces DVD My Man Godfrey DVD Nancy Drew: The Long Journey Home DVD America At War CD & DVD set. Diaries 1980-2001: From Political Disaster to Election Triumph by Giles Radice Alien Power figure (unnamed). “Save Our Planet”. Thumb Wrestling Federation - Gill Thumb Wrestling Federation - Vini Vidi Victory Winter Cranberry - Scented Candle in a Tin 1 box of Maltesers

		Notes: 1. First, a word of explanation. I fully intended to skip reporting my next visits to Poundland thinking that I would only be doing Christmas rubbish present buying and I couldn’t be bothered hiding my purchases beneath cgi effects to maintain the mystery. But, of course, I had forgotten the Fifth Rule of Poundland or a variant thereof, and so I ended up buying things for myself which I thought needed noting. Luckily I then realised that I was master of my fate and captain of my soul and I could merely record my purchases now but shove them up in space later, i.e. after Santa’s bin and gone. So, that’s what I’ve done. Or will do. Eh up, mind me temporal anomaly. 2. My Man Godfrey I bought because I don’t like it, but I can’t remember why. It’s years since I saw it so I thought I should give it another go. Picking Up The Pieces is one of those films with such an impressive cast (Woody Allen, Keifer Sutherland, Sharon Stone and Elliott Gould among many others) that it’s strange I’ve never heard of it. This usually means it’s one of those films where the film-makers have a very jolly time but fail to communicate that jollity to the audience. Either that, or the satirical treatment of religion was not well-received in America. Which brings us to Starship Troopers 3: Marauder. Where the first film in the series, directed by Paul Verhoeven, was a brilliant satire of American foreign policy (much cleverer and far more entertaining than Kubrick’s Dr. Strangelove in my opinion), the second (shorn of budget and Verhoeven) a straightfoward moonbase film, the third in the series brings back the satirical edge and throws religion into the mix. So far there haven’t been many great films made about 9/11 and the war on terror, but this is definitely one of them. 3. The purpose of rubbish Christmas present buying is to bulk up the sack (stocking, pillowcase, pile - whichever method you choose) so as to fool the recipient. Of course, there has to be a reason for buying the rubbish. For example the ‘Thumb Wrestling Federation - Gill’ was chosen for the good lady wife because that is her name. This does not mean that you can buy anything which has the name of your loved one stamped upon it - many items such as keyrings would fit that bill. It is all to do with the context. Amongst all the appropriate wrestlerish names, ‘Gill’ leapt out as a tad odd. The Alien Power toy has no name at all and was acquired for No. 1 son since he had picked it up in the Chichester Poundland and then put it back, laughing. As well he might. In the area of rubbish action figures this one stands supreme. Not only is it unnamed, it is also confusing. The packet bears the legend, “Save Our Planet” but does not specify which planet it is referring to. Are we saving the planet of the vaguely tree man with some tentacles and a crown on his head, or is he a threat to ours. If the latter I don’t think we need worry too much. Of course, if we wish to search for a subtext we could remark on the fact that it is made in China and the rubbishness of the toy could indicate the increasing economic influence of the Chinese in the world. They no longer have to beguile our offspring with quality items like Jungle Panda, they can now get away with producing any old rubbish while they concentrate on wooing the upper echelons of our society. After the Nobel Peace Prize business maybe we should boycott Chinese rubbish entirely, but then our visits to Poundland would be seriously curtailed. Anyway, No. 1 son gets the vaguely tree man with some tentacles and a crown on his head in his stocking. The Nancy Drew DVD is for his good lady wife.



		4. One of the side-effects of rubbish Christmas present buying is that you sometimes come across things that you’re not sure whether you want yourself, but rather than blocking the aisle while you make your mind up, you just decide to give it to somebody else who lives in the same house as you. Thus the memoirs of Giles Radice. This was the last copy in the shop (so there must be much interociter construction going on in Stoke at the moment) and I took that as a sign I should buy it. Plus, if I give it to the good lady wife she may think it is one of the many books on her Christmas list and her disappointment on opening the parcel will be a cause of much merriment (one hopes). Similarly, I was in two minds about the America at War CD/DVD set. On the one hand the CD has a nice selection of tracks from Artie Shaw, Charlie Barnett, Tommy Dorsey and the rest (although I’m not sure what Geraldo is doing in there since he should be on the Britain at War CD/DVD set with Ambrose and other British bandleaders who could only afford one name in those austere times) but I’m not really interested in the DVD. So, another round of hilarity when it turns out not to be a Neil Diamond CD. 5. Apparently a friend of the good lady wife’s went into Mr. Waterstone’s shop after a book (nowt obscure like Aristotle’s Poetics, just summat about Darwin) and was told head office wouldn’t let them stock it in Stoke because it was too highbrow for us troglodytes. I’ve always thought this was the case with the Odeon not showing foreign films because we can’t read the subtitles, but it’s disappointing to find a bookshop playing the same game. Not so with Poundland where even budding Latin scholars are catered for:



	Friday, 17th December - Stafford




	The Special Relationship DVD. The Interceptor DVD. Johnny Vegas - Live at the Benidorm Palace DVD. Battle Deck - Dragon Darkness. 2 Toy Story 3 The Claw! LCD Keychain games. The World Of car - DIE-Cast Metal. Monkey purse. 2 birthday cards Dove Sunshine Summer Glow + SPF 15 daily face moisturiser. 4 bars of Imperial Leather soap. Supplies: 1 pack of 6 disposable lighters.

		Notes: 1. I had no idea that Stafford had a Poundland - they’re springing up all over the place. This one was quite a large store, very light and airy, well-stocked and, maybe it was just me, but I did think the clientele was a little more upmarket than what I’m used to in Stoke (i.e. Hanley - we call it Stoke but Hanley’s where the shops are, it’s confusing for visitors but we dunner care) at least everyone seemed to be striding around purposefully rather than shuffling about and stopping to marvel at the gewgaws on display and getting in everyone’s way (that was me). I didn’t really have time to take in everything in the shop since it was the week before Jesus was being born and everyone had decided to drive their cars from Stoke to Stafford on that day to prepare for the momentous event which has brought such joy to the world that the BBC will commemorate it with a new Dr. Who and cockney people fighting. Also the good lady wife was with me (hence the frankincense and myrrh, which I believe also contain SPF 15) and we were mainly looking round for things with which to fill stockings - i.e. random toys. 2. No. 1 son has requested money for Christmas to pay for driving lessons, so we also thought we’d buy him a car. I suggested one from ‘The World of car’ range. I don’t know who came up with that name since toys don’t list everyone who had anything to do with their production like films have to do these days, which is a pity because then we’d know if he’s all right. As it is, it looks like a bloke at the production meeting got up and started all confident and Lord Sugarly and said we’ll call it “The World of” and then went all quiet and mumbled “car” but then why would the rest of the team go along with it? Unless he was suddenly struck down with a heart attack before he could get out the ‘s’ and as he writhed around on the floor clutching his shoulder, as you do, nobody dared say anything so they all agreed to go along with it. Maybe he died and so they tried to replicate his final moments by imaginative use of fonts. We’ll never know. It’s DIE-Cast metal though - maybe that’s a clue. 3. The DVDs need explaining. The Johnny Vegas DVD is for my mate Clive who is a fan. Hopefully he hasn’t got it since I don’t want it back. The Special Relationship was on telly and we missed it. It’s probably a foolish purchase since it will be repeated sometime and although I’m curious, especially as regards Dennis Quaid playing Bill Clinton, it’s not really something I’m desperate to own. But that’s a Poundland thing, you see something vaguely interesting and Rule No. 1 kicks in. It also stars Michael Sheen repeating his performance as Tony Blair. Personally I don’t go along with the general view that Michael Sheen is this wonderful actor who can magically transform himself into Kenneth Williams and David Frost and Brian Clough and Tony Blair. He is a good mimic, but the weaselly little face always remains the same and I just think why is Mike Yarwood getting all this work. The Interceptor is a Russian film - in Russian with English subtitles (says so on the back of the box), so that’s enough reason to buy it. According to the blurb: “Special Forces agent, Matvey Sobolev, is on a secret mission transporting the world’s first psychotronic weapon, a mind-control armament powerful enough to control the will of the world. After being double-crossed by his former partner, Kuryla, a puppet of the force of Darkness, Matvey regains consciousness 40,000 feet above the earth, alone on an abandoned jet, wired with explosives, as the bomb timer counts down, Matvey leaps to certain death seconds before his aircraft self destructs and sets the sky on fire.” So, after a quick check to make sure it wasn’t directed by Mike Leigh, and Michael Sheen isn’t playing Mikhail Gorbachev, I put it in the basket.



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